Genesis
Thursday, 24th June 2004, 12:14 am.
It feels like my life is slipping away.
Not in the sense of life vs. death, just... dissipating.
I think I'm becoming too comfortable with my life. To the point where I drift through each day with a vague contentment, waiting for something to happen but not really expecting anything to.
The alternative, I guess, is to make a change.
Still waters run deep - and also stink, or so I've read.
What do you measure the worth of your day in?
Contentment? Personal pleasure? Creative projects? Money earned? Friends made? Movies seen?
I think I'm probably letting myself know that I need a job - if not for the money, then for the need to be constantly doing something.
Saturday, 26 June 2004, 7:29 pm.
My assumed name is Draic. It forms a part of my real name, and would probably be pronounced 'Rick', with an Irish accent. But I'm not exactly horrified that people might confuse it with 'Drake', with its 'dragon' connotations as well as its 'duck' ones.
I was originally going to call this blog 'Before Pandora', which refers to, I suppose, a state of innocence. But the two words are also a kind of doom - you know that some time in the future, the horrors will be unleashed.
...Which just showed the state of mind I was in at that point.
So I changed it to 'Beyond Pandora', which is less depressing overall, and refers to the idea that there is more than simple good and evil.
This is the stuff I think about.
It feels like my life is slipping away.
Not in the sense of life vs. death, just... dissipating.
I think I'm becoming too comfortable with my life. To the point where I drift through each day with a vague contentment, waiting for something to happen but not really expecting anything to.
The alternative, I guess, is to make a change.
Still waters run deep - and also stink, or so I've read.
What do you measure the worth of your day in?
Contentment? Personal pleasure? Creative projects? Money earned? Friends made? Movies seen?
I think I'm probably letting myself know that I need a job - if not for the money, then for the need to be constantly doing something.
Saturday, 26 June 2004, 7:29 pm.
My assumed name is Draic. It forms a part of my real name, and would probably be pronounced 'Rick', with an Irish accent. But I'm not exactly horrified that people might confuse it with 'Drake', with its 'dragon' connotations as well as its 'duck' ones.
I was originally going to call this blog 'Before Pandora', which refers to, I suppose, a state of innocence. But the two words are also a kind of doom - you know that some time in the future, the horrors will be unleashed.
...Which just showed the state of mind I was in at that point.
So I changed it to 'Beyond Pandora', which is less depressing overall, and refers to the idea that there is more than simple good and evil.
This is the stuff I think about.
posted by Draic | 7:23 pm
1 Comments:
You think about interesting stuff.
The worth of my day is measured in several ways, depending on the needs of my ego.
1) Most days are measured for their worth in the number and proportion of things crossed off my list. This is not always satisfactory, as currently indicated by my holiday list, which is going pretty well, but still, at the end of the day, I find myself asking, 'but what did you DO today?'
2) When I need something more, I ask myself 'How have I changed someone else's life?' or 'How is my life different?' Sounds somewhat grandiose, but you'd be surprised how often I can provide real answers.
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